The Empath's Revolution - To Thine Own Self Be True
Reflections…I started out wanting to write about cherries, picked off the tree in my backyard, but that will come on another day.
There is a lot of chaos and sadness around these parts these days: Detroit under siege, no justice for Trayvon…these are the tips of icebergs. Mountains of fear and the desperate attempts to control that fear, through the distribution of power, the crushing weights of racism and classism, the daily injustices that go unnoticed, un-marched, unchallenged, unknown by turned cheek, blind eye, blissful ignorance, and more fear. Fear of the known. To acknowledge it is to accept it if you're not working actively to do something about it.
Over the years, those who have worked with me in the activist community, know one of my favorite sayings was "The revolution ain't got no pause button!" Meaning there really was no valid reason in my mind not to be working, in the streets, at the office, or thinking about working, being in the streets, or at the office. My children grew up attending rallies, workshops, and strategy sessions. I pushed myself and those I worked with to do more, more, more! People are dying! And we have to DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!! We have work to do!!
Over the years, events happened that took me out of that loop, that endless cycle of work and that process. Major health challenges, family transitions, you know…life. I lost my ability to juggle the balls and spin the plates at the same time, and dropped quite a few of them. I lost the compass that let me know why I was doing all of this. The endless energy, clear thought, endurance, focus…gone. This was frightening because the struggle for justice defined me for so long that I couldn't figure out what had happened. And why, when the personal issues peeked in the room, the work wasn't slamming the door in their faces as it had on so many occasions before as my refuge, my justifiable denial. The harder I tried to ignore it and push forward, the more things spun out of the illusion of control and I felt abandoned by the people and activities that had given me purpose and direction and song and dance and poetry. But what had really happened is I had lost myself, and the Universe gave me my marching orders to find her.
Have you seen me?
Maybe not as much lately in the usual places and haunts. The empath in me has taken a stand. The feelings of overwhelm and confusion will not be denied their say and they are speaking to me loudly. I now know "working actively to do something about it" also involves what you choose not to do and why.
I am only of effective service in community to the extent
I work to be whole on a personal and familial level.
Healing and happiness is a lifelong journey, not a destination. I feel so blessed to have come into this understanding for myself. For me, balancing joy and struggle is an ongoing thing as well, the key word there being balance. I knew how to work…but I needed to unearth the deeper forgotten answers to:
What brings you joy?
What makes you happy?
What rituals do you consider sacred to well being, your own spiritually…and universally?
What restores hope to you?
What rejuvenates you?
I have work to do!! These next months you will find me finding me. Reconnecting with hearth and home, enjoying the loves of my life, and learning all I can about everything that brings me joy. This does not mean I am ignoring or stepping back/out/away from my responsibilities as a community representative, member, and activist. This is so I can be even better at it...and survive.
Polonius:
This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.
Farewell, my blessing season this in thee!